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Unknown's avatar Dave Mattingly 1:15 pm on February 9, 2016  

Spatial Data, Part 6: Cleveland

This is followup to my part five series on spatial data:

At SQL Saturday Cleveland 473, I showed some Ohio- and Cleveland-specific examples.

Downloading the Cleveland Data

You can download the scripts and data input files here at the event page, or individually below.

Importing the Cleveland Data

Querying the Cleveland Data

This query joins those tables together into a single spatial result.

select '' name, geometry::Point(-81.935191, 41.470970, 0).STBuffer(.08).STBoundary() geom union all 
select isnull(nullif(name,''),type), geom from cle_roads union all 
select isnull(nullif(name,''),type), geom.STBoundary() from cle_landuse union all 
select isnull(nullif(name,''),type), geom.STBoundary() from cle_natural union all 
select isnull(nullif(name,''),type), geom from cle_railways union all 
select isnull(nullif(name,''),type), geom.STBoundary() from cle_waterways union all 
select isnull(nullif(name,''),type), geom.STBuffer(.00002) from cle_points union all 
select isnull(nullif(name,''),type), geom from cle_buildings

Spatial Results

Let’s break the script down:

  • the first line in the script draws the big circle around the area.
  • the other lines bring in the geom field from each table (either the whole object or just its outline via STBoundary).
  • the nullif lets us convert any blank into nulls, which lets us use ifnull to insert another value, essentially giving us the name column unless it is blank or null, in which case it gives us the type column

From here, we can:

  • zoom in for more detail
  • hover over a building, road, or other feature to see its name or other column
  • display a label on the results
  • apply filters to only show parts of the data
  • change the widths of the features by changing the STBuffer
  • do lots of other cool stuff

Digging Deeper

To download the data for your entire state, go to download.geofabrik.de (or a variety of other geodata sites), and drill down to the state or other area you’d like.

Download the .shp.zip file, then unzip the contents and import them using Shape2Sql.

 

 

Unknown's avatar Dave Mattingly 3:44 pm on February 6, 2016  

Get in the Game

I’m a Christian, and sometimes a teacher/preacher.

"Find me someone who can play well." (1 Samuel 16:17)

“Find me someone who can play well.”
(1 Samuel 16:17)

This sermon is timed to tie in with Superbowl Sunday.

Selected

We aren’t just spectators in this life, or in the next. We’re major players. The A team. The starters.

As followers of Christ, we have been chosen — specifically — to be the front line in the battle for human souls.

We are here for a reason. We are specifically chosen. God Almighty has a job for us to do.

Jesus saw Simon and Andrew casting a net into the lake, for they were fishermen. Jesus said, “Come, follow me, and I will make you fishers of men.” At once they left their nets and followed him. (Mark 1:16)

“Go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. Surely I am with you always, to the end of the age.” (Matthew 28:19-20)

You are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. (1 Peter 2:9)

PracticePractice

Every new skill that we learn is hard before it becomes easy. Many occupations require constant training and updating, as the methods, regulations, and technologies change.

Our spiritual skills also need updating. The only time that you can coast on a bicycle is when you’re going downhill. Without some exercise in our prayer life, evangelism, mercy, and other spiritual muscles, we’ll end up with a soft-in-the-middle spiritual paunch.

Let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, to sit down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. (Hebrews 12:1-3)

No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. Therefore, strengthen your feeble arms and weak knees. (Hebrews 12:11-12)

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving. (Colossians 3:23-24)

We rejoice, for we know that trials develop endurance.  And endurance develops character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. (Romans 5:3-4)

“He has blocked me so I cannot pass.” (Job 19:8)

Obstacles

News Flash: life isn’t easy. Marathon runners often talk about “hitting the wall.” That’s the point at which (to oversimplify) the body has run out of easy-to-burn fuel like carbohydrates and begins to eat fat cells from the body. Breathing becomes labored, muscles feel like they’re on fire, and the road ahead seems longer and harder than it probably really is.

There are times in our life when God seems absent, or the circumstances of life become overwhelming.

He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. (Isaiah 40:29-31)

Do not be surprised at the fiery trial that has come on you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. However, if you suffer as a Christian, do not be ashamed, but praise God that you bear that name. (1 Peter 4:12,16)

Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own? You have been bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body. (1 Corinthians 6:19)

Physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come. (1 Timothy 4:8)

ReasonReason

When we’re “down at the half” — when you’ve hit that wall — we can regain our energy by focusing on our purpose.

 

What we are fighting for is worth far more than any temporary pain or difficulty. Our eternal salvation and the salvation of our friends and family are at stake. Our choices and words have everlasting impact.

Fight the good fight for the true faith. Hold tightly to the eternal life to which God has called you, which you have confessed so well before many witnesses. (1 Timothy 6:12)

My only aim is to finish the race and complete the task that the Lord Jesus has given me –  the task of testifying to the good news of God’s grace. (Acts 20:24)

I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead – I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 3:12-14)

Triumph

We can win, and will win. The war is already over, even though we still fight individual skirmishes.

The crown is waiting for us at the end of the race, and Christ will supply us with the strength we need to win.

TriumphDo you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it for a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; and I do not fight like a boxer beating the air. No, I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I will not be disqualified for the prize. (1 Corinthians 9:24-27)

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:13)

I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. (2 Timothy 4:7)

Well done, good and faithful servant. (Matthew 25:21)

Summary

We have been chosen, and should train to overcome trials by focusing on the goal, which will take us to victory.

S – Selected (1 Peter 2:9)
P – Practice (Romans 5:4)
O – Obstacles (1 Timothy 4:8)
R – Reason (Philippians 3:13)
T – Triumph (1 Corinthians 9:25)

Download

Download the PowerPoint.

 

Unknown's avatar Dave Mattingly 1:45 pm on February 5, 2016  

Psychobilly

Here are some of my favorite psychobilly bands. For those not familiar with the genre, “psychobilly” is an unlikely blend of rockabilly, punk, country, dance, goth, ska, bluegrass, glam, roots rock, surf, doo-wop, and soul. The music, fashion, and culture often incorporate an element of B horror movies.

These are “my” bands. The bands that helped shape who I am, roughly in order of how much they mean to me.

Dave Mattingly: The Musical, Part 6

  • Southern Culture on the SkidsSouthern Culture On The Skids
    • Known For: Camel Walk
    • Memories: I once heard Southern Culture on the Skids (SCOTS) described as the trailer park B-52’s. I can get behind that. They’re independent, playful, and bizarre. At concerts, they often throw food at the audience (fried chicken during “8 Piece Box” and pudding during “Banana Puddin'”).
    • Favorite Songs: Cheap Motel, 8 Piece Box, Dance for Me, Soul City

Go back to Part 5: A Cappella or on to Part 7: Rap and Hip-Hop

Unknown's avatar Dave Mattingly 12:38 pm on February 2, 2016  

Monsters and Aliens in the Bible

I’m a Christian, and sometimes a teacher/preacher.

As a weirdo, I love reaching out to my fellow weirdos.

Monsters Back in the Day…

There are several monsters recorded in the Bible’s Old Testament.

There were giants in the earth in those days. The sons of God bred with the daughters of man, they gave birth to children who became the heroes and famous warriors of ancient times. (Genesis 6:4)

The giants were called nephilim. The race of giant is where Goliath came from. The sons of God here could refer to angels (probably of the fallen kind), or of God’s chosen people.

Look at Behemoth, which I made, just as I made you. It eats grass like an ox. See its powerful muscles. Its tail is as strong as a cedar. Its bones are tubes of bronze. Its limbs are bars of iron. It lies under the plants, hidden by the reeds in the marsh. It is not disturbed by the raging river, not concerned when the swelling Jordan rushes around it. The Behemoth is a prime example of God’s handiwork. Only its Creator can threaten it. (Job 40:15-24)

The Leviathan’s double coat of armor is impenetrable. Its mouth is ringed with fearsome teeth. Its back has rows of shields tightly sealed together. It snorts flashes of light; its eyes are like the rays of dawn. Lightning leaps from its mouth; flames of fire flash out. Smoke pours from its nostrils like steam from a heated pot. Its breath kindles coals, and flames shoot from its mouth. Its heart is hard as rock. No sword can stop it, no spear, dart, or javelin. Iron is nothing but straw to that creature, and bronze is like rotten wood. Arrows cannot make it flee. Stones shot from a sling are like bits of grass. Clubs are counted as stubble; he laughs at the rattle of javelins. Its belly is covered with scales as sharp as glass, that plow up the ground as it drags through the mud. It makes the waters boil like a kettle. Nothing on earth is its equal– a creature without fear. (Job 41:13-34)

In that day the Lord will take his terrible swift sword and punish Leviathan, the swiftly moving serpent, the coiling writhing serpent. He will kill the dragon of the sea. (Isaiah 27:1)

Some have postulated that the Behemoth and Leviathan are today’s hippopotamus and alligator, respectively. Some of the descriptions fit, but the language would have to be hyperbolic. The Behemoth’s tail being as strong as a cedar makes it sound more like a dinosaur to me. And the Leviathan snorting flashes of light and making waters boil like a kettle doesn’t sound like any alligator I’ve heard of.

Another Bible monster is the giant fish that swallowed Jonah and vomited him out onto after three days. It’s possible that he was not alone when that happened. The reason that all the Ninevites repented could be that many of them saw him “ride into town” on a giant sea serpent.

Monsters Coming Soon…

Not all Bible monsters are in the past. As we approach the end times, there will come a monstrous beast.

A beast will come from the sea, having ten horns and seven heads. The beast is like a leopard, with feet like those of a bear, and a mouth like a lion’s. The dragon will give him his power. One of the beast’s heads had been slain, but the fatal wound had been healed. The whole earth was amazed and worshiped the dragon and the beast. (Revelation 13:1-3)

This could be allegoric. If the beast is a collection of nations, the leopard could refer to Africa, the bear could refer to Russia, and the lion to England representing three continents.

UFOAliens in the Bible

Ezekiel describes something that sounds very similar to what we’d consider a spaceship with alien visitors.

I saw an immense cloud that flashed with lightning, and shone with brilliant light. The center looked like glowing metal. Out came four beings that looked human but they had four faces and four wings, with a hand beneath each wing. Each of them had a human face in the front, a lion’s face on the right, a bull’s face on the left, and an eagle’s face in the back. (Ezekiel 1:4-10)

Aliens Among Us

There is another kind of alien, and there are some here on Earth right now. You may know one, or even be one.

I urge you as strangers and aliens to abstain from sinful desires that battle for your soul. (1 Peter 2:11)

All these people were still living by faith when they died. They admitted that they were strangers and aliens on earth. (Hebrews 11:13)

Alien here is used with the meaning of foreigner or outsider.

I saw a new heaven and a new earth: for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away; and there was no more sea. (Revelation 21:1)

This is not our home. As Christians, our citizenship is heaven. We are here as ambassadors to a foreign land, representing our king and his kingdom.

We should live lives of such distinction that we seem to be from another planet. Some of us has a head start on that aspect. 😉

Go out there and be an alien for God.

Download

You can download the slides here.

Unknown's avatar Dave Mattingly 10:00 am on February 1, 2016  

Cool Job: Wolf3D

I’ve done a lot of things for a living over the years, and my next job after NASA was also one of the coolest.

Cool Job, Part 2: Wolf3D

After getting the human race back into outer space, I helped get us into virtual space.Wolfenstein 3D Intro

I took a job at a startup virtual reality company back in 1992, I believe. Alternate Worlds Technology (AWT), which would eventually become Agora Interactive.

Wolfenstein 3D was the most popular PC game at the time, by a longshot. I recommend the book (or audiobook) Masters of Doom for an excellent history on the game, the creators, and the culture. Id Software was on my (very) shortlist of game companies that I’d have loved to work for. A group of friends made games that were so good, they earned millions each year from shareware (a “pay what you like” business model), which was completely unheard of.

The Reality Rocket was a sit-down arcade game cabinet that could take any PC game, and pump it into a VR headset. Players could see the gamescape as they ran down the hall attacking bad guys. They could also use the helmet to turn their heads to see around corners and such.Reality Rocket

My part of this project was to take that amazingly cool game, and reprogram the software so it would work with a virtual reality helmet, which I did.

I also got to use my artistic skills to create new graphics and to “skin” the game differently just as that idea was beginning to grab hold of the developer community.

The technology and the game cabinet had the potential to go far, but a few things got in the way. First, the VR tech wasn’t quite ready for long-term usage by most people. The graphics were low-resolution (CGA), and many people (5 to 10%) experienced some motion sickness. Second, the project’s financial backer had some… problems with law enforcement.

I’m glad I got to work on such a cool project that let me help advance the state of the industry.Wolfenstein 3D Play

But around that time, I was beginning to lose my taste for electronic games. At first, I’d considered game development to be a programmer programming a game. But over time, I felt more like the game was programming the gamers, and the whole experience began to sour for me. Even now, I’ll play some word games here and there on my phone, but my days of electronic action gaming are decades-long gone.

Go back to Part 1: NASA or on to Part 3: Floor Show

Unknown's avatar Dave Mattingly 7:54 am on February 1, 2016  

A Cappella

Over the years, I’ve realized that my favorite musical instrument is the human voice.

A cappella eventually became the largest section of my music collection. At one point, I think I had 500 or so a cappella albums.

Here are my favorite professional a cappella bands. Collegiate a cappella has become its own genre, and will be covered in a later post.

These are “my” bands. The bands that helped shape who I am, roughly in order of how much they mean to me.

Dave Mattingly: The Musical, Part 5

  • The Bobs The Bobs
    • Known For: Helter Skelter
    • Memories: When I first saw that album came with a warning label that all the sounds were made on or by the human body, I knew I’d enjoy them. I’d always love when Gunner Bob’s Levi’s commercial would air. You wouldn’t have to argue hard to make the case that they single-handedly quartet-handedly created beatbox style a cappella as a genre. The musical world recognized it too, and awarded the band a Grammy for Best New Arrangement for their cover of Helter Skelter.
    • Favorite Songs: Particle Man, March Fanfare, Banana Love, Helmet, Psycho Killer, Ring of Fire, You Can’t Do That
  • The Acappella CompanyRockapella
    • Known For: Elijah Rock
    • Memories: The first song I heard from the Acappella Company was Elijah Rock, which is still a favorite. But I was told that the band was Rockapella, not this one. I spent a few years looking through Rockapella albums to find this song, to no avail. When I finally found the right band, I was thrilled to find an extensive repertoire of new a cappella music to explore.
    • Favorite Songs: Give Thanks, We Bow Down, Only Truth, Rock of Ages, He Gave Her Water
  • The Trenchcoats / The CoatsTrenchcoats
    • Known For: I Can See Clearly Now
    • Memories: The Trenchcoats attack a cappella with enthusiasm and goofiness. I love that they jump into weirdness with both feet. They could almost qualify as a comedy band.
    • Favorite Songs: All You Can Eat, Faith, Mary’s Nachos, These Boots were Made for Walking, 500 Miles, Down on the Corner

Go back to Part 4: Parody Music or on to Part 6: Psychobilly

Unknown's avatar Dave Mattingly 4:15 pm on January 27, 2016  

Spatial Data, Part 5: Resources

This is part five in a series:

The things we’ve looked at over the last few lessons come from things that I’ve picked up from the people and places that I mention here.

Resources

1. Smart People

Much of what I’ve learned, I learned from these folks:

2. Recursion and Fractals

Simon Greener shows how to make a circle that’s made of circles, with text showing their position. The whole Spatial DB Advisor is filled with amazing tricks.

Alastair Aitchison shows have to draw recursive triangles.

Slava Murygin shows how to make recursive snowflakes.

Recursive Circles Fractal TriangleSnowflake

3. Artwork

Alex Whittles shows how to convert a vector image into geospatial data.

Click these images to see how to make Grinch, a Christmas tree with proper coloring, one with random ornaments, Venus, or a hotel floorplan.

Grinch Colored Tree Random Tree Venus Floorplan

4. Utilities

SQL Magazine offers a quite of utilities to handle a variety of graphic and charting situations.

Download here.

5. Color Palette

The default color scheme that SQL uses doesn’t always fit the bill. But by specifying the order of the items you display, you can control which one gets which color.

;with n(x) as (select 0 union all select x+1 from n where x < 99)
select cast(x as varchar) label,
geometry::Point(x%10,x/10,0).STBuffer(.5)
from n order by x

The palette ends up looking like this.

Colors

6. Finding Geospatial Data

There are many collections of geospatial data available for free (and many more for pay). Being a cheapskate myself, I tend to stick with free as much as possible.

Search for terms like shapefile, geospatial, data, and the region (Kentucky, etc.) and the type of data (geography, roads, elevation, demographics, roads, etc.) that you’re interested in.

I generally prefer to work with .SHP shapefiles, but there are a number of filetypes out there. KML (Keyhole Markup Language) is another popular one.

When I get specific local data including buildings (like I did for MTSU in Part 2), I prefer to use the service at bbbike.org, but MapSys gives an overview of the various ways to find and import geospatial data.

7. Loading Geospatial Data

The tool I prefer for load the data is Shape2SQL from SharpGIS. It’s lightweight and easy to use, and the instructions should handle whatever troubles you might run into.

The one thing to keep in mind is that if you’re loading geographical data, you’ll need to switch the datatype and pick and SRID (usually the default of 4326).

Shape2SQL

8. A Parting Gift

For a little fun, run this select:

select convert(geometry,'multipolygon (((0.0193705 0.678262, 0.0871671 0.678262, 0.164649 0.290852, 0.251816 0.629835, 0.329298 0.629835, 0.416465 0.281167, 0.493947 0.678262, 0.552058 0.678262, 0.455206 0.194, 0.377724 0.194, 0.290557 0.562039, 0.184019 0.194, 0.106538 0.194, 0.0193705 0.678262), (0.59037 0.678262, 0.658167 0.678262, 0.735649 0.290852, 0.822816 0.629835, 0.900298 0.629835, 0.987465 0.281167, 1.06495 0.678262, 1.12306 0.678262, 1.02621 0.194, 0.948724 0.194, 0.861557 0.562039, 0.755019 0.194, 0.677538 0.194, 0.59037 0.678262), (1.16137 0.678262, 1.22917 0.678262, 1.30665 0.290852, 1.39382 0.629835, 1.4713 0.629835, 1.55847 0.281167, 1.63595 0.678262, 1.69406 0.678262, 1.59721 0.194, 1.51972 0.194, 1.43256 0.562039, 1.32602 0.194, 1.24854 0.194, 1.16137 0.678262), (1.93576 0.329593, 2.06167 0.329593, 2.06167 0.203685, 1.93576 0.203685, 1.93576 0.329593), (2.70046 0.901022, 2.77795 0.901022, 2.77795 0.194, 2.70046 0.194, 2.70046 0.290852, 2.64235 0.223056, 2.59393 0.194, 2.56487 0.184315, 2.50676 0.184315, 2.46802 0.194, 2.42928 0.223056, 2.39054 0.271482, 2.36148 0.368334, 2.36148 0.465186, 2.38085 0.552354, 2.40991 0.610465, 2.45833 0.658891, 2.49707 0.678262, 2.52613 0.687947, 2.59393 0.687947, 2.64235 0.668576, 2.70046 0.62015, 2.70046 0.901022), (2.70046 0.562039, 2.70046 0.348964, 2.62298 0.271482, 2.58424 0.252111, 2.52613 0.252111, 2.48739 0.281167, 2.46802 0.310223, 2.44865 0.368334, 2.44865 0.484557, 2.46802 0.542668, 2.48739 0.581409, 2.51645 0.610465, 2.5455 0.629835, 2.60361 0.629835, 2.65204 0.60078, 2.70046 0.562039), (2.95185 0.658891, 3.01965 0.678262, 3.06807 0.687947, 3.17461 0.687947, 3.21335 0.678262, 3.25209 0.658891, 3.27146 0.629835, 3.29083 0.571724, 3.29083 0.271482, 3.30052 0.252111, 3.31989 0.242426, 3.35863 0.242426, 3.36832 0.203685, 3.32958 0.184315, 3.29083 0.184315, 3.25209 0.203685, 3.22304 0.252111, 3.1843 0.223056, 3.12619 0.194, 3.08745 0.184315, 3.02933 0.184315, 2.99059 0.194, 2.96154 0.21337, 2.93248 0.242426, 2.91311 0.290852, 2.91311 0.348964, 2.93248 0.39739, 2.98091 0.445816, 3.01965 0.465186, 3.08745 0.484557, 3.21335 0.484557, 3.21335 0.562039, 3.19398 0.60078, 3.14556 0.629835, 3.06807 0.629835, 3.00996 0.610465, 2.95185 0.581409, 2.95185 0.658891), (3.21335 0.436131, 3.12619 0.436131, 3.06807 0.41676, 3.02933 0.39739, 3.00028 0.348964, 3.00028 0.300538, 3.01965 0.271482, 3.05839 0.242426, 3.10682 0.242426, 3.16493 0.261797, 3.21335 0.300538, 3.21335 0.436131), (3.46474 0.678262, 3.55191 0.678262, 3.71656 0.281167, 3.88121 0.678262, 3.95869 0.678262, 3.74561 0.194, 3.66813 0.194, 3.46474 0.678262), (4.49579 0.41676, 4.15681 0.41676, 4.15681 0.368334, 4.17618 0.329593, 4.19555 0.300538, 4.24397 0.261797, 4.30208 0.242426, 4.37957 0.242426, 4.42799 0.252111, 4.49579 0.271482, 4.49579 0.21337, 4.42799 0.194, 4.36988 0.184315, 4.28271 0.184315, 4.23429 0.194, 4.16649 0.223056, 4.11806 0.261797, 4.08901 0.310223, 4.06964 0.378019, 4.06964 0.474872, 4.07932 0.523298, 4.09869 0.571724, 4.14712 0.629835, 4.19555 0.668576, 4.26334 0.687947, 4.34083 0.687947, 4.39894 0.668576, 4.43768 0.639521, 4.46673 0.60078, 4.4861 0.552354, 4.49579 0.494242, 4.49579 0.41676), (4.40862 0.474872, 4.15681 0.474872, 4.16649 0.523298, 4.18586 0.562039, 4.2246 0.610465, 4.26334 0.629835, 4.32145 0.629835, 4.3602 0.610465, 4.38925 0.581409, 4.40862 0.532983, 4.40862 0.474872), (4.62127 0.678262, 4.68906 0.678262, 4.68906 0.581409, 4.72781 0.639521, 4.76655 0.678262, 4.78592 0.687947, 4.83434 0.687947, 4.8634 0.658891, 4.88277 0.62015, 4.89245 0.581409, 4.92151 0.629835, 4.95057 0.668576, 4.98931 0.687947, 5.02805 0.687947, 5.0571 0.668576, 5.07647 0.639521, 5.08616 0.591094, 5.08616 0.194, 5.01836 0.194, 5.01836 0.591094, 4.98931 0.62015, 4.96994 0.62015, 4.9312 0.581409, 4.89245 0.513613, 4.89245 0.194, 4.82466 0.194, 4.82466 0.591094, 4.7956 0.62015, 4.77623 0.62015, 4.71812 0.562039, 4.68906 0.513613, 4.68906 0.194, 4.62127 0.194, 4.62127 0.678262), (5.23585 0.658891, 5.30365 0.678262, 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Unknown's avatar Dave Mattingly 7:34 am on January 27, 2016  

Parody Music

Back when I was a DJ at WLCV radio, I broadcast the Dr. Demento show every week for several years.

Here are some of my favorite parody bands, specifically only counting artists who base their music on other people’s music and lyrics, not just general comedy musicians (who will come later) or cover bands (also later).

These are “my” bands. The bands that helped shape who I am, roughly in order of how much they mean to me.

Dave Mattingly: The Musical, Part 4

  • Big DaddyBig Daddy
    • Known For: Monster Mash-Up
    • Memories: Writing a parody is tough enough; staying true to the original music and tweaking the words. But Big Daddy keeps the words, and puts in the music from a completely different song, which completely blows me away. My favorite is their working stiffs mash-up of the Money for Nothing lyrics set to the Sixteen Tons music. Brilliant!
    • Favorite Songs: Money for Nothing, Safety Dance, Whip It, Once in a Lifetime
  • Allan ShermanAllan Sherman
  • Carla UlbrichCarla Ulbrich
    • Known For: The Guy Who Changes the Light Bulbs
    • Memories: There was a time that I wasn’t sure Carla’s health would let her keep going, but she turned it in fuel for comedy, and became known as The Singing Patient. Her album Sick Humor and her book How Can You Not Laugh at a Time Like This are among my favorites. I usually call her “pancake girl” thanks to her Name song.
    • Favorite Songs: I Got Tremors, A Name is a Name, The Force is the Force
  • Tim CavanaghTim Cavanagh
    • Known For: 99 Dead Baboons
    • Memories: When I saw Tim at a DPMA (Data Processing Management Association) meeting in the ’80s, I was the only guy in the audience shouting out requests. The meeting emcee gave out door prizes “worth well over $1,000,” so Tim brought out a bag of prizes worth “well over $7.” He gave out a rubber dog toy (“Do you have a rubber dog?”), and when I caught up with him after the show, there was still a prize in his bag, which he gave to me. An autographed box of prunes.
    • Favorite Songs: I Wanna Kiss Her, Pistons, Dead Russian Leaders, Bible Outlet

Go back to Part 3: Alt Rock or on to Part 5: A Cappella.

 

 

Unknown's avatar Dave Mattingly 6:30 pm on January 26, 2016  

Cool Job: NASA

Challenger

Oh, the humanity!

I’ve done a lot of things for a living over the years, and one of my first was also one of the coolest.

Cool Job, Part 1: NASA

On 1/28/86, the space shuttle Challenger blew up.

Later that year, I got a call from NASA with a job offer, which I accepted. Over the phone. They didn’t realize I had an orange mohawk. I was still a teenager, after all. Ya gotta live.

A few months after that, I moved down to Florida to work at Kennedy Space Center, where I worked in the Mission Planning Office and helped write the software that scheduled shuttle launches, landings, and maintenance.

NASA's Trailer Park

Capt. Kirk: “No, I’m from Iowa. I only work in outer space.”

I got a haircut before starting, and looked like a real person. But before long, I was back to my old cranial tricks.

My office is visible in all of the footage used in the movies. That one giant building that’s always shown is the VAB – the Vehicle Assembly Building. It’s the mechanic’s garage where the shuttle goes for its oil changes and other maintenance.

My job was actually in NASA’s “Trailer Park.” There were some old railroad cars pushed together sideways with the open sliding doors lined up, making a large single office with branching rooms, sort of. It was a cheap way to use old equipment to make something new-ish. It was air-conditioned, carpeted, and otherwise very nice inside, but I found it amusing that it was practically made of garbage.

When we went back into space the following year, I got to stand on my office rooftop to watch the launch. The vibrations shook my whole body. It was amazing.

I didn’t like Florida, so once we got back into space, I considered my work done, and I moved a thousand miles north so I could do some other nifty tech stuff instead. More on that in my next cool job installment.

Space Shuttle

The stars look very different today.

But writing space shuttle software for NASA as a teenager is certainly a powerful feather in anyone’s geek cred hat.

Go on to Part 2: Wolf3D

Unknown's avatar Dave Mattingly 1:04 pm on January 26, 2016  

A Reason for Hope

I’m a Christian, and sometimes a teacher/preacher.

Here’s a look at my own story of coming to Christ. This is a very personal story, and won’t necessarily have the wide applicability of some of my other sermons and lessons. I encourage all of you to map out your own walk with Christ.

A Reason for Hope

The Bible tells us to “always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have.” I am ready. In fact, that 1 Peter 3:15 verse is a good summary of my testimony.

“Come, let us reason together,” says the Lord.  (Isaiah 1:18)

RebelRebel

I grew up as a rebel. The world stank, and I didn’t like it. I fought the world by looking and acting different, by arguing and debating, and by spending time on what many would consider the wrong side of the tracks.

In those days Israel had no king; everyone did as they saw fit.  (Judges 21:25)

EngineerEngineer

I was a math and science whiz, and got my college degree in engineering math and computer science, to better understand the physical and digital worlds. I also minored in psychology and philosophy, to better understand the mind and reality. Over the years, I’ve worked for NASA, Homeland Security, some intelligence agencies that shall go unnamed, virtual reality tech, and many other brainy ‘science-y’ places.

Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth? Tell me, if you know so much. (Job 38:4)

AtheistAtheist

I stopped believing in God as a young’un. I believed that “In the beginning was nothing, which then exploded.” When we die, we turn to dust, and that’s that. My time surrounded by rebels and engineers only served to bolster my own opinion.

Only fools say in their hearts, “There is no God.” They are corrupt, and their actions are evil. (Psalms 53:1)

ScribeScribe

Although I didn’t care much for writing while I was in school, I found after college that I rather enjoyed it. I went on to write hundreds of articles for magazines and newspapers, and after coauthoring some books even founded my own publishing company. Every writer is also a voracious reader, and I was no exception.

See what large letters I use as I write to you with my own hand! (Galatians 6:11)Oddball

Oddball

After awkwardly trying to fit in growing up, I realized that I wasn’t meant to be like everyone else, and I sort of liked it that way. I am what I am, and that’s all what I am, as the Sailor Man would say.

They admitted that they were strangers and aliens on earth. (Hebrews 11:13)

NerdNerd

And of course, I was into all the various nerdy things. Comic books and cartoons, Monty Python, games and toys, science fiction and fantasy, Weird Al, and such. Different from most people, at least at the time. (Nerds are enjoying a bit of a golden age at the moment.)

God gave Joseph unusual wisdom. (Acts 7:10)

Encounter with ChristJesus

That’s who I had been. A weirdo. (Well, I still am a weirdo.)

But my life turned around when I went into business with a Christian who was a real Christian.

Homayoun Sarabi was an engineer from Iran, and was also a Christian. (None of the ‘normal’ American Christians could reach me; God had to import a guy.) We went into business, and were often on the road together. While on the road for business events, often on the weekends, “Homer” would politely invite me to church with him and I’d politely decline.

Over time, the peace and joy that I saw in his life, and the obvious care he had for those around him drew me in. One day in North Carolina, I did go to church with him, and accepted that altar call (the first I’d ever heard).Holy Spirit

Holy Spirit

My eyes were opened, and my heart was thirsty for the Lord. I read the scripture. I went to worship. I learned at Bible studies. I took classes at church. My soul was on fire, and I couldn’t get enough.

No one can see the kingdom of God unless they are born again. (John 3:3)Overhaul

Overhaul

Similar to an addict who knows when he’s hit rock bottom, I couldn’t kid myself that I was “doing okay” and could ease into walking with the Lord. My life’s direction did a full 180, and I turned some heads doing it. Not quite to the extent of Paul in Acts 9:26, but drastic enough for me.

If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has gone, the new is here. (2 Corinthians 5:7)

Purpose

Hey, wait a minute. That’s a porpoise!

Purpose

Now instead of being a collection of chemical reactions drifting inevitably toward oblivion, I felt that there was a reason behind my existence. God had me — specifically me — here for a some particular part of his plan.

Who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this? (Esther 4:14)

EvangelismChristian Gamers Guild

Now, I use my nerdy background to reach out to the freaks, geeks, and weirdo of the world. My people.

Through groups like the Christian Gamers Guild, Fans for Christ, Game Church, and Grave Robbers, plus my own activities in the local community, I can set up church services at comic cons, sci-fi cons, gaming cons, and other gatherings of my fellow oddballs. As “one of their kind” I can speak to them without being some outside churchy guy trying to horn in on their lives. I’m already part of their lives. Because they are me. Weird and loved.

I have become all things to all people so that by all possible means I might save some.  (1 Corinthians 9:22)

Summary

I can give a reason for my hope because of who I was, and because of who I am.

R – Rebel
E – Engineer
A – Atheist
S – Scribe
O – Oddball
N – Nerd

H – Holy Spirit
O – Overhaul
P – Purpose
E – Evangelism

Download

Download the PowerPoint.

Next

Learn how I use my testimony to reach others at All Things to All Men.